Big Idea #1: Shifting from Victim to Creator

One of the biggest shifts that we can make is from asking ourselves “what’s not working?” to asking instead, “what can I create?” The ultimate value in an idea is how useful it is. The same goes for the questions we ask ourselves! We can really shift our reality by shifting the types of questions that we’re asking ourselves.

So if something is happening in your life that doesn’t match your ideal situation, it can be really helpful to shift from a victim mindset to a creator mindset. Rather than focusing on what’s going wrong, look at the situation and see what you can create from it. This might mean going for something that you really want, instead of settling for something that’s just “okay!”

And the important point to remember is that you can go for what you really want, without worrying about feeling rejected or disappointed. Remember that when you step out and ask for something or really go for what you want, you’re okay either way! You’re not going to offend anyone by asking for what it is that you want, and whether or not you get it, you’re okay anyway. Release attachment to that thing and just try going for it! This is being a true creator in your life, rather than a victim.

Big Idea #2: Living From a Place of Excitement

Do you ever feel like you’re craving more in your life? Maybe everything seems like it’s going well on the outside, but you’re feeling like you miss some element of excitement. It can be really frustrating when we’re looking for excitement and happiness outside of ourselves, but unfortunately this is what we’ve been conditioned to do.

Instead of trying to “get excited” or “reach excitement”, live from a place of excitement. Excitement is not a place to get to, it’s a place to live from. It’s the same idea as when we’re talking about service: we don’t get to a place of serving someone, we start living from service. We often tend to live with this mindset of wanting to get somewhere, or filling some lack that we have. But all that we need is already inside of us, and when we live from that place, those things we want start to amplify and be magnified from inside of us.

And when all else fails…when you don’t know the answer, live the question! In fact, life is all about living the question. Creation in life comes from emptiness and uncertainty.

We’re in a society that values instant gratification and those “highs” in life that aren’t really sustainable. Our culture doesn’t value the plateaus in life, which causes many people to quit something once the peak stage ends. But in order to achieve greatness, we must move through the plateau periods where growth happens, even when it doesn’t look or feel especially exciting. Here is where we can practice living from excitement, in order to break through to the highest level.

“Your passion is the thing you still want to do, even when it’s not fun doing.”

Big Idea #3: Want versus Need

Some of us have a lot of trouble asking for what it is that we really want. It might be easy to serve others and put others needs ahead of our own, but when it comes to ourselves, we often find it hard to be clear about how to meet our own needs. We want to make sure that other people are happy, so we put our own needs on the backburner.

What stops you from asking for what you really want?

Are you worried about what the other person is going to think? Are you worried that their feelings will be hurt?

This is often just a story we tell ourselves: “If I tell this person what I really want, then they won’t be happy.” But the truth is that if you tell them what you want, then you’ll be happy… and chances are, they want you to be happy anyway!

Or you story might look something like this: “If I ask for what I want, then I’m being vulnerable. And if I’m vulnerable and don’t get what I want, then I shouldn’t be vulnerable anymore.”

With this story, we might tell ourselves that we need to depend solely on ourselves, and never be vulnerable, so we can avoid being hurt. So depending on ourselves is like the opposite of vulnerability. We can start to feel this way when we’re coming from a place of NEED. When we’re needy, we might feel rejected when we don’t get what we ask for from others.

But you can ask for what you want, and still be able to depend on yourself and be safe. This comes through asking from a place of WANT instead of a place of NEED. When you ask for what you want from a place of WANT, then you’ll always be okay if you aren’t received in the way you’d like. Coming from a place of WANT means that you’re cool with going for something, and being okay even if you don’t get it. But coming from a place of NEED means that you’re putting your self-worth on the line whenever you ask for something.

HW + Action Steps!

As always, we’d love for you to share your personal favorite takeaways in the private Facebook group.